Thursday, August 21, 2008

I'm Listening

Every other Wednesday morning I pick up the phone and call a spiritual mentor of mine. Last November I decided to commit to that call for one year. My life had taken a great turn and I wanted some guidance as I navigated a new relationship, started writing my book in earnest, said goodbye to old ways of thinking about work and money, and let more love into my life. Who better than Rosa to keep me on track and help me take an honest look at myself.

I've known Rosa since the summer of 1993. She was the first person I went to when my life was spiraling out of control. She literally took me in her arms and held me as I screamed and cried and laughed away years of pain. I often tell people that she saved my life. Fifteen years later I still find myself weeping tears of gratitude when she says, "I'm listening, Joe." How wonderful it is to be heard! This past Wednesday I told Rosa that the words "I'm listening" are often all I need for my healing.

Last week I started reading the book Narative Medicine - The Use of History and Story in the Healing Process by Lewis Mehl-Madrona, M.D. The book "examines the foundations of the indigenous use of story as a healing modality" and "points the way to a new model of medicine - a health care system that draws its effectiveness from listening to the healing wisdom of the past and also to the present-day voices of its patients." How great is that?

Murray Nossel facilitates storytelling courses in Manhattan. His company, Narativ, is founded on the premise that we all have a story to tell and that our story is shaped by the way the audience is listening. Having participated in Murray's classes, I can tell you that he's quite right.

Which brings me back to Rosa. Part of what I'm doing twice a month on the phone with her is telling my old stories, the ones that I've told over and over again, the ones that keep me stuck in the past, whining about the shoulda-coulda -woulda's. "Where does that story come from?", she often asks. When I get to the root of it, the old story loses it's power. "Tell yourself a new story, Joe. I'm listening"

Wednesday, August 13, 2008

Engaging the Inner Artist

This morning I sat in meditation and heard the following:

"Engage the artist. Engage the creative. Engage the creator."

Those words brought tears to my eyes and an ache to my heart.

For the past few weeks I have been walking around New York City - Manhattan, not the outer boroughs - and have been struck by the what I've seen (or nor seen). Buildings, people, clothing... It all seemed to blend. Nothing stood out. My friends have been kind enough to tolerate my repeated rantings.

"Where are the artists, the individuals who happily and courageously express their style?" I've implored.

"Look in Brooklyn," some have said.

Yesterday I asked myself if there wasn't something artistic in me that needs to be expressed, brought to life. I collected a few magazines from the laundry room today and have begun to think about creating a collage, something unlike the collages I've created in the past, a new form. I've been programing different music into Pandora on the internet (go to http://www.pandora.com/ - it's fantastic). I've been approaching my writing in a new way. I realize that I have a unique voice, a unique vision. Why not let it out?


My meditation ended with this message:

"We invite you to acknowledge your inner artist - through words, images, sound. Express! Express! Express! And LOVE the process."

And so I am. Amen!

Joe

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

You Are What You Are

August 6, 2008



"For me there is only the traveling on paths that have heart, on any path that may have heart. There I travel, and the only worthwhile challenge is to traverse its full length. And there I travel, looking, looking breathlessly." - Don Juan, from Carlos Castaneda's The Teachings of Don Juan



I love the work of Carlos Castaneda. It always reminds me to be true to myself, to be my self. A wonderful teacher of mine always asks, "What do you want, Joe?" And then she reminds me that if I continue to want, I may not be trusting that the things that I want are already here, just waiting for me to step into.



Today in meditation I had a vision of people from my past walking out of my body, saying goodbye. It was not a sad moment. It was a moment to recognize that the past is the past and I cannot change it. What I can change, and always strive to, is the way I think about the past. Another mentor of mine, Lorna Roberts, often talked about "the hungry ghosts of the past". Are we letting the ghosts of the past keep us from being present to what is in front of us now and from moving into our future with great freedom and joy?



What do you want?



Further listening in today's meditation brought this:

Your openness will ultimately allow love to funnel in! You are LOVE. You breathe LOVE. You emit LOVE. There is more LOVE in you than anything else. When you allow that LOVE to come in and go out, everything around you must change. The vibration of LOVE is so abundantly powerful it will alter the course of any other energy. Remember: LOVE created you. Love will all ways love you.



Thanks and Peace!



Joe